Sunday, September 30, 2007

the perfect song that expresses every little words i didn't dare to say. enjoy~

All That I Need
Corrinne May

I'm sorry that I hurt you
I took for granted all you gave
so freely to me
I pray it's not too late
To save you from a broken heart
To promise you
I'll make a brand new start
Believe me, when I say

You are all that I need
The only treasure I seek
You're the air that helps me breathe
through the darkest night when
I fall down on my knees
I was blind but now I see
You are all that I need

You know I'm far from perfect
Like a child that needs a guiding hand
Can you stay here with me?
I finally understand
You've always been the missing part
Complete the jigsaw puzzle of my heart
Please hear me, when I say

You are all that I need
The only treasure I seek
You're the air that helps me breathe
through the darkest night when
I fall down on my knees
I was blind but now I see
You are all that I need

Please,
let me hear your voice again
Let me hear you say
your love will never end
That whatever it takes you'll be there
Believe me, when I say

You are all that I need
The only treasure I seek
You're the air that helps me breathe
through the darkest night when
I fall down on my knees
I was blind but now I see
You are all that I need
You are all that I need.

you're the reason ;
5:39 PM

suddenly feel like going to somewhere with lots and lots of snow. lol. den if thirsty, can just pick up a ball of snow den eat like ice kachang like that. lol! =X. but i think it will be super dirty. lol. looking at the trees filled with snow makes me feel like eating cotton candy coz cotton candy also fluffy fluffy den some is white colour de. lol.

back to reality. i'm in this hot, sunny weather. lol. though it's better than raining the whole day, but i still dun like hot weather though i like the sunny feeling. so, if it's in a snowy place, even if there's sunshine, it'll still cold. wont that be nice?! lol. someone pull me back to reality, pls. lol.

anw. i've totally given up on pscm tutorial coz i dun understand anything from it. and since it's grpwork, think i'll do during the tutorial session ba. more heads better than one. so, basically, i'm free now. OH. still got my psycho journal. sian. i going to do at night coz got more feel den can write more smoothly. lol. tomolo's 2nd week of sem2. (it rhymes!) so fast. and tomolo's the beginning of a brand new month!! wah. den two more months plus plus will mark the end of 2007. so fast!! and 2008 will be approaching us veri quickly. time passes so fast that it's scary sometimes. and i cant believe my bro and sis birdae coming. >.<>

see ya tomolo in sch. it's another day where i stay in sch till the sky turns dark. sian.

you're the reason ;
5:21 PM

Thursday, September 27, 2007

hmm. it's supposedly thurs now coz it's after 12am. and the first 3 days of sch has been horrendous! but the starting is always like that de ba. firstly, tutors and lecturers will be telling u what books u need to buy and the CAs, deadlines for the different modules. lol. althou in this way, tutorials gt shorten a lot more, but it's so boring.

and the buying books part is so annoying la. have to go around asking for prices den get the cheapest one, althou still will be quite expensive. lol. contradicting leh. but school's been quite ok with unique frens like liming who loves to go "eh, you veri irritating leh~" lol. =X. luckily she doesn't read my blog. lol.

and the 3 day long cca drive is finally done and over with! lol. and i no need to walk all the way to fc5 there le. aiya, forgot tomolo still muz go there de popular buy pscm de book. -.- ma fan! and the fri i'm dreading is coming.. the day in which i hav 5hrs de break. >.<

you're the reason ;
12:01 AM

Sunday, September 23, 2007

it's a lazy and sleepy sunday afternoon~ (or rather, evening?)
woke up early this morning at 9am to go bai bai. lol. thanks to my mum who woke me up with her "screaming". den came back an hour ago onli.

sian. sch's starting tomolo le. =( busy busy days ahead again and it's going to be a state of rushing out reports, ppts, presenting and the list goes on and on... this time round, i feel that the hols are so short it's like we only had a week of hols den it's back to sch again. hmm. i did nothing during this hols except meetings and meetings. lol. but whoever said u need to hav something to do during hols? it's a time for relaxing! lol. comforting myself.

and! i have to go sch early tomolo to print some stuff for CCA drive. sian. which means, i cant meet up with melissa althou she denies missing me, but i noe it's not her heartfelt words. lol. dun be too sad la, melissa, we can still meet up on tues de. lol.

it's gonna be a long long day starting from tomolo~ the start of waking up early and coming home late and not being able to watch tv everyday. =( and the thing i dread most is that i hav to decide what to eat for lunch at fc6 starting from tomolo. argh. i hate deciding on what to eat, what's more i have to choose from fc6 de limited stalls. =( and, i wonder why am i not missing the food in fc6 despite not eating it for like abt 1mth le? lol. qi guai.

oh ya. and i had a freaking scary nightmare last night. =S and i hope it'll nv happen in real life.

you're the reason ;
5:01 PM

Saturday, September 22, 2007

woke up early in the morning to go to sch todae to set up cca booth and the person in charge of laying out the booths was late for like 1 and 1/2 h? waited so long la. next time for this kind of stuff, cannot turn up too early. lol.

so in the end, we set up our booth. den came home, bathed, watched tv. den i watched watched watched till i fell asleep for 5-10 min. lol. during this whole month of hols, i nv watched tv till i fell asleep before sia, no matter how boring the show is. which means.. tonight muz sleep earlier liao. and! melissa suddenly called and chat to me for like an hour? lol. i noe u missed me that's why u called right. lol. mon sch reopen can see me le ma, so impatient arh u. LOL. =X. den laughed on the phone wif her, as always when we talk on the phone. lol.

nothing to update about le, i can feel i'm in a dreamy state right now. zzz. mon's sch reopening =S

you're the reason ;
11:30 PM

went out wif my mum todae to get mooncakes. lol. and going out with her means two things. one, my leg going to be veri pain coz she walks faster than me den i have to be half running, half walking to catch up with her. two, my hands veri pain as well coz i become free labour to her. lol. hav to help her take things.

den she got super super stm i think. (evidence below)
me: "why muz get mooncakes?"
mum:"coz hav to give to ppl ma."

den after about a while,

me:"why muz buy and give ppl?"
mum:"i got say give ppl ar?"
me:"you got say!!"
and she still scolded me siao. -.-

den came back home. den watched tv. den end of fri. lol.

school starting soon le and dennis sim sent us email to get us to print his notes adn tutorials le la! remind me there's still 2 more days to sch reopen. lol. planned to update a lot of things. but right now, i'm having those i-wan-to-vomit feeling. so, i forgot what to update abt le. lol. =x

you're the reason ;
1:17 AM

Thursday, September 20, 2007

when i come to this page, i dunno what to type and update about le. lol. and just today, i realised how vague and useless a word of sorry means. i noe no matter how many times i say sorry to you also no use. i'm bad at consoling ppl, i admit. and so when u cried todae, i really didn't noe what to say to console you. and i noe i cant cry also. lol. it makes me feel guilty but i dun hav the right to cry coz i'm in the wrong.

and i'm sitting here, with a heavy heart, the words u said scarred in my mind. i dunno what to do anymore. and it's now, when i'm all alone that i noe i can let my mood run low mode.

someone, supply cold jokes pls.

you're the reason ;
10:38 PM

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

hmm. headached for almost the whole day todae and i think it's coz i had a nightmare last night. lol. the dream really veri fast-paced. LOL. and it was so real. and den woke up to help choose gems and so sorry that i didn't manage to get the slot that you wanted. =( coz the comp didn't wan to work with me. =( den felt guilty for the whole day. hmm. nvm, tomolo i'll try my best to choose the same as yours. lol.

was supposed to go to sentosa and help jinhong celebrate birdae but my ankle was still hurting coz i think yesterday walk too much le. so cant make it to sentosa. SORRY jinhong! hope you had a nice time! hmm. tomolo still got meeting for amazing race. hope i'll not be the one going. lol. sian.

you're the reason ;
9:34 PM

HAPPY BIRDAE TO YOU MS EE JINHONG!!!!
finally, you've grown up (in terms of age) and joined in the 18 club!!
so in the photo, only left MS ELAINE who hav not joined in our club. lol.
anyway, this post i've decided to dedicate it to the birdae gal. be honoured ok! lol.

i'm not gonna go on abt how valuable u're as a fren to me,
i'm not gonna go on abt how u've always given me advice when i needed it,
i'm not going to say how much i cherish you coz u noe it all.

instead, since u've lived 18 years of ur life in this world, i would just like to take this chance to tell you to live your life well and never ever regret anything you do. and! most importantly, no matter what you do, always think of yourself first. may sound a bit selfish but this is your life and you got to live it the way you wan it, the way you see it. and! you only live once so make good use of this life to do things u really really wan to do! =)

and i hope that you're really happy now and have a fabulous day, not onli on 18sep but also in every other day of your life! though it's impossible to hav trouble-free days, but still, stay happy!

and from here, i hope all your wishes can come true one by one and,
that you'll find someone nice to you,
find a nice boyfren,
enjoy everyday of your life,
love me more =x. lol

last, wishing you a FANTASTIC HAPPY 18 BIRDAE!!!!! =)

you're the reason ;
12:08 AM

Sunday, September 16, 2007

the setting sun lays a peaceful warmth to the neighbourhood. lol. nice place right. taken from opposite my house. and the angle is just right such that i captured the setting sky. and from here look over, really quite peaceful wor.

went for a run todae at evening time coz i felt that i really veri long nv run le. almost since i kissed my sec sch and 3 months course period goodbye, i've nv really run le. lol. k la, mayb a few times but still cant be compared to running every week during PE. lol. so i went to run at yishun park todae. and my stamina is so lousy. lol. and i kept having left abdominal pains, those kinds whereby u'll experience when u walk too fast. and i think it's coz of lack of stamina. lol. it was still quite painful during dinner but now ok le. so while walking back to my home, i took a shot of the really beautiful sight. lol.

you're the reason ;
12:59 AM

Thursday, September 13, 2007

went out with yiqi todae. she didn't change a lot from the past. lol. but i really cant stand that guy who is wooing her. so__. if i were her, i think i surely ask him to get lost liao. full details on what he did are so much that it's hard for me and also i'm lazy to type it out. lol. so next time den tell it to you all ba, IF i remember. lol.

and while i was taking the train to go meet her, in came a group of guys who were talking extremely loudly. and i think they just finished exercising. den one of them begin to spray LARGE amounts of deodorant around themselves. den wah, in a few seconds, the whole mrt was extremely smelly. den that guy still say, "wah. i like this deodorant, the smell veri nice." lol. i almost fainted when i hear that comment. and come to think of it, he saying himself nice smelling also leh. yucks. lol. =x.

you're the reason ;
11:48 PM

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

ah ha. results out le. after having so many nights of dreams abt it, finally, it's out and i can sleep peacefully le.

well. it wasn't as bad as what i would have thought it out to be. lol. not as depressing. and to think i've been pondering and worrying abt it for so long! lol. once again, dun think i'm trying to show off.

Module Code - Credit Unit - Grade
---------------------------------
MR - 4 - A
GEMS - 2 - A
QA - 3 - DIST
UCCD - 3 - DIST
FMA - 4 - DIST
SSM - 4 - B+
RWPS - 3 - B+

SEMESTER GPA: 3.848
CUMULATIVE GPA: 3.76

my results took me by shock sia. and i checked a lot of times to make sure
my name is correct. lol.
and i'm really thankful to whoever who marked my MR paper,
coz when i was doing, it was the paper that made me wan to cry out
right in the exam hall. but still, i'm glad it hasn't let me down. lol.
and i've finally proved to krishna!! lol. despite all the bias he's shown to me,
i'm glad i got dist for my fma!! lol. shows him i can do it! lol. crazy le.
and finally, is my ssm. thanks to whoever who marked it as well,
helping me to pull up from a pathetic C to B+.
and my gems really surprised me, coz it's such a difficult gem,
i nv tot to get A for it. lol. thanks to the veri kind teacher!

thanks to everyone who helped me in one way or another this sem,
whether it's just offering some encouragements or whatsoever.
thanks a lot. =D

now, i can onli noe my psycho marks tomolo. lol. sian.
but at least, i'm really happy with this sem's grades.
at least, my holidays is complete.
and i can enjoy my hols without a care in this world now. =)

off to a good night's sleep. =)

you're the reason ;
2:38 AM

Monday, September 10, 2007

few days nv update le. lol. went for jinhong's chalet on sat and laughed a lot there, all thanks to the entertainer-cum-clown, elaine. lol. den we were laughing at the chalet next to us also. coz their bbq no fire de den took veri long for something to get cooked. lol. den after that, blew out cake. and they smashed whipped cream on jinhong's face. luckily i ran away fast enough if not, jinhong would have smeared her creamed hand on me like what she did to poor kaiyin also. lol.

den had meeting in clubhouse todae. and we were supposed to meet at 1.30 but joseph and ivan came only at 2.30. which is exactly ONE hour late. lol. den we started our meeting, keep side-tracking den got pulled back by ivan. lol. but it was really funny with joseph around keep giving some stupid suggestions and comments. lol. and there was a lot of laughter at the meeting as well. lol.

i think this whole week is just meeting, meeting, meeting. tomolo got meeting also abt sentosa den wed got meeting with joanne. this time round without andrew. lol. let's see how it'll turn out ba.

you're the reason ;
9:48 PM

Thursday, September 06, 2007

hmm. nothing much happened todae, but felt like something was missing. and i went to the lib todae alone coz my sis went to sch and i had to go to the lib to get myself busy so that i wont be reminded of unhappy things. seems like running away from my problems, i noe. but, i dun wan to see myself with a "smelly" face everyday.

yesterday had meeting with joanne and her boss. overall, quite ok ba. and suddenly, andrew and jinhong could make it to the meeting. lol. so it was still quite ok. and i had to admit that andrew's not a qi guai de person. lol. he's quite responsible lah, and he gives me the feeling of a big bro. lol. thou he's veri cold also. and we discovered something veri qiao.

me: "..... u hav gf ar?"
andrew: "ya."
jh: "how long?"
andrew: "almost 5 months."
me and jh: " so qiao?!"

lol. it's the same duration as me sia. but luckily dates different if not, i think me and jinhong will freak out. lol. and since his anniversary is 3 days aft mine, he asked me to remind him. -.- and yesterday, he showed me and jh his true form. he was hundred times colder than me la! so jh should be glad i haven reach his level yet. lol.

and i personally think this holiday is a repetition of the previous one. just that, this time round, i dunno what's the reason behind everything. i dun wan think too much also ba. hmm. without you here, i guess i hav to learn to revert back to the past where i only complain my problems to myself, cannot complain to others. lol. not to you, you, you. lol. hope everything's fine over there. nothing to write abt also le. tomolo's another long day~~ but surprisingly, todae passed rather quickly. lol. qi guai.

oh ya, did i mention that my family going to japan in dec. but without me! lol. coz got sch. =( thou i would hav loved to go there. oh well. think i hav to go sleep with my aunt. i wan stay home alone also my mum dun allow. lol. well, it's still a long time away.

you're the reason ;
11:50 PM

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

hmm. changed my blog's song le. obvious right. lol. got ears also will noe. =x

anw, this blog song sort of reminds me of the time i spent playing my dear cello. dunno why leh, coz the song some components got cello de accompanying music ba. and i really miss playing the cello. it's been close to 2 years since i touched cello. last time i played it was when i was still in SPCO but sad to say, that was not really the place for me, so i quit. and now.

i miss touching cello de strings,
i miss holding the bow,
i miss pulling the bow along the 4 strings,
i miss placing my fingers on the different positions of the string to make different sounds,
i miss hugging my cello when my hands are tired of playing it,
i miss hugging it when i'm in a bad mood,
i miss playing on it to vent out my mood,
i miss cello.

there's perhaps one good thing abt cello, that is, if u're in a bad mood, and you sort of put ur hands over the cello as if u're hugging it and putting ur heart close to the wood, it would be like u're pouring ur whole heart to the cello. it's a veri comforting feeling, coz being an instrument, it would not betray you.

my dearest.

you're the reason ;
5:13 PM

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

perhaps you can just shrug it off and say your behaviour is a result of your character. but mayb it's all only an excuse that u've found for your behaviour. i didn't wan to blog abt this but there's no one to complain to now! so, i can onli spill everything out here. it's frustrating, sickening and even, "awesome" at seeing how ur so-called character can make you maintain such a relationship with her. as i've said a lot of times, sometimes, forgive and forget is something you muz always learn to do. what would happen if someone does the same thing to you? wont you feel bad as well? wont you wan the other person to forgive you? do to people only things you wan them to do to you. dun do the things to people those that you dun wan them to do to you.

really, it's perhaps time to learn the virtue of forgiving. it's essential in this world todae, i think. 18 years and it's a ripe age that u should start learning this. i'll bear with this for now.

and you're the only one who perhaps will empathise wif me.

you're the reason ;
9:36 PM

Monday, September 03, 2007

life's still quite "peaceful" or u might wan to call it boring. lol. lots of club affairs and it's like doing groupwork once again. ppl cant make it to certain meetings and blah blah blah. oh well. whoever said that taking up a proj was going to be easy peesy. but since it's hols, i shall not think to much. give my brain cells a break as well.

anw, still trying to find a job despite having like onli 2-3 weeks of hols left. lol. nothing to update abt leh. so boring.

i'm sure i'll miss you.

you're the reason ;
11:09 PM

Saturday, September 01, 2007

went back to sch todae or rather, yesterday since it's already past midnight now. and everything from the start of the journey just reminds me of my secondary sch days. lol.

right from the very start where i had to rush to the bus stop coz i was running 15 min late,
to still having to wait for the bus to come,
to riding the bumpy bus ride on 169,
and right up to alighting the bus and seeing lots lots lots of pp wearing MF uniforms. lol.

but something happened which did not happen for once during my 4 years of taking 169. the bell broke down. den i was the only one alighting at the stop den cant press coz no reaction de, the bell. den i quickly panicked coz the bus was going to reach the stop le. den as i was walking towards the exit, the bus BRAKED. and i almost fell forward and banged on an old lady. lol. but luckily i didn't. den i quickly go and press and press the other bell before the bus leaves. lol. i always see ppl press the bell den realise is spoiled den i'll always be wondering what'll happen if it's me. den todae, it really happened. lol.

den went in, looked for teachers. and the sch so guo fen lah, say 10.45 cant go in and see teachers le. but, as usual, rules are perhaps to be broken afterall. looked for my lit-cum-eng teacher and she was saying our batch is the best of all, with our class' boys being so entertaining. lol. or some would say childish. but we also cant deny that they are really funny clowns. lol. =x. den she said she missed teaching our cls. lol. den wanted to look for my maths teacher, but as usual, he went off too early for us to "catch" him. we got so scary meh. lol. den finally saw my chi teacher while we are leaving. and he veri gladly forgot our names den still say is coz he's slow. lol. but at least, he admitted that la. and all this while, our never-changed-a-bit OM kept blowing blowing his whistle to get us out of the sch. -.- clearly depicts the saying, "a leopard never changes its spot" huh. lol.

den after that went to lunch wif my sec sch frens. and they also never changed a bit, still can "discuss" abt a lot of ppl's things. lol. and they're just like elaine that type--veri resourceful. a lot of secrets we dunno they will surely noe de. lol. and of course spent dunno like how long "discussing" ppl. but me and jingting were bored coz we didn't noe anyone they were discussing abt since it's from their sch. lol.

went to my tuition teacher's house and had a long chat with her, at least one hour ba. lol. after so long, it's still nice to talk to her and she hasn't changed a bit. den chatted and of course did girls' fav pasttime--gossip. lol. but mainly is gossip abt those ppl who deserved the tongue lashings. lol. also talked abt each other's progress in life. and it's really nice to do that ba. sometime, some catch-up really add colours to the otherwise boring life. lol. and! my tuition teacher called me "huiling" TWICE. lol. next to do some catch-up with would be my dear primary sch fren. lol.

den came home at abt 9 plus wif my sis who ended her tuition as well. and suddenly, got gastric while having dinner. hmm. weird. den i told my mum den she said,"why will gastric? coz u nv eat in the noon right?" lol. and i told her i did eat. den she didn't say anything. and i was thinking of making a glass of hot milk for myself to stop it. veri long not that painful le sia. but as my stomach felt too full to absorb the milk, in the end, i also nv make it. lol. den after that, gradually got well.

and here i am, typing at the comp. one of my longest entry ba. lol. and i'm getting queasy again. how to sleep later?? think i muz really go to the doc's le, wait til one day i'm brave enough ba. lol. til then, hope my stomach co-operates with me. thanks my dear stomach. LOL.

you're the reason ;
1:27 AM